Enemies of Reason Poundshop potshots at the media moral maze.

Yes, I have a complaint

Here is the Mail's complaints procedure. As you'd expect, given that Paul Dacre has sat at the very top of both the Mail and the PCC (no conflict of interest there!), it directs you towards the Press Complaints Commission, or as I like to call it, 'the organisation that pretends to give a shit about you while politely fobbing you off and defending its friends in the corporate media'.

Do you have a complaint against this newspaper?
Last updated at 16:21pm on 29th November 2007
Do you have a complaint against this newspaper?
If you have a complaint about the editorial content in this website which concerns inaccuracy or intrusion and the article directly affects you, then write to the editor with your complaint.

If you remain dissatisfied then please contact the Press Complaints Commission - a self regulatory body established to uphold a Code of Practice, agreed by the industry, for all newspapers in the UK. The PCC will then seek to resolve your complaint quickly and amicably

To contact the Commission: Halton House, 20/23 Holborn, London EC1N 2JD Tel: 020 7831 0022 Fax: 020 7831 0025 Helpline: 0845 600 2757 www.pcc.org.uk

The key thing is 'and the article directly affects you'. I have attempted to register complaints with the PCC before, but they aren't interested unless it's actually about me. But, I protest, the article does directly affect me, it makes me irritated, disgusted and annoyed at the sheer shit journalism. Ah, they say, never mind son, now fuck off.

If I have a complaint about the PCC - that it's a toothless and pointless body merely set up to avoid government regulation, run by big corporate media to ensure that it never really has to do anything to curb its more disgraceful tendencies - whom do I go to then?

Maybe the members of the PCC could set up a PCCCC, a Press Complaints Commission Complaints Commission. This would listen to complaints about the Press Complaints Commission. Like the PCC, it would be completely made up of people with vested interests in ensuring that the PCC didn't get into trouble, so the PCCCC would be composed of people who work for the PCC. They would claim to try and resolve complaints about the PCC rapidly, but of course in truth the best they could offer would be to write a letter to you, saying "aww, diddums" and then blow a raspberry at you. And that would be about it.

Of course, if you were dissatisfied with the PCCCC, you could always write to the PCCCCCC. The Press Complaints Commission Complaints Commission Complaints Commission would be composed of people who work for the Press Complaints Commission Complaints Commission, therefore ensuring its complete and utter dependence and subservience...

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